Photographer Calls For Selfie Stick Free Weddings, Gets Massive Approval, Has To Take The Post Down

April 20, 2015 by Udi Tirosh 61 Comments

Many photographers don’t appreciate the fact that wedding guests use their camera and smartphone to take photos during a wedding. This is mostly because those many times interfere with the work of the photographer.

The post below surfaced on facebook and was massively shared gaining around 4,000 shares and 5,500 likes in the course of three days:

I rarely get this upset, but this has me upset. I don’t want to ever see this happen to our clients photos ever again.

This just has to stop. Over the years it’s become harder and harder to fight the occasional over zealous guest with a camera phone. Now with the invention of the selfie stick it looks like we’re just losing the battle.

Brides and Grooms, please have an unplugged wedding ceremony. Please tell your guests to put their phones away. Please tell them to leave their selfie sticks at home.

Guests, please have respect for the wedding you are attending. Simply put, the Bride and Groom pay a lot for professional photography. You have no right to ruin it for them. Sticking a selfie stick out in the middle of the aisle during a processional in a church is so completely selfish. Think twice, think about your friends and their memories. Just put the phone away and enjoy the day.

In fact the post has become so popular that the photographer had to take it down as it was taking the page’s attention from her wedding photos to a bigger and heated discussion.

We contacted the photographer who agreed to share the post and asked not to be mentioned by name to keep focusing on her work, rather than the facebook status.

About Udi Tirosh

Udi Tirosh is the Founder and Editor in Chief of DIYPhotography, he is also a photographer, a relentless entrepreneur, a prolific inventor and a dad, not necessarily in that order

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Zamfirescu Vladimir-Alexandru

Not even a question worth considering. Is shooting weddings not difficult enough without idiotic crazes? What about the fact it’s a solemn ceremony and people are stupid enough (I wanna say retarded, due to selfie sticks) to ignore being present there and are instead snapping away.
- Elamar
  
  Snapping away is a way of being present. It’s also a way of better remembering a special moment. Let’s stop denigrating people who take pictures as not being present.
TMS3100

People need to be beat with their selfie sticks. The selfie is the ultimate in narcism.
Petar Maksimovic

Apart from the whole wedding thing, owning and using selfie stick is just an idiocity in itself.
Are they promoting their looks for sale or something? Nobody cares if you are beautiful or not, get over it, not on hourly bases at least.
JW

I understand the statements against the selfie sticks and I hate them too.
But if you want to make shots where you have full control over it – use your studio or set up your session with the bride and groom.
Your job as a wedding photographer is to report what happened. And if there are so called “selfish” and “stupid” guests – report it. Have you ever considered that even you could be an obstacle for all the other guests when you try to do the best shot while standing in the middle of the church making sounds that were not here 50 years ago?
- Akira
  
  Agreed. I’ll just document everything happens on that day. I also work as a wedding photographer in Taiwan. In my country, people always bring their DSLR and some with even external flashes! We photographers are already get used to it. In my thought, they are the guests of the bride and groom, and I think they have the rights to do it as long as they are happy. I am just a photographer that hired to recored everything happen on that day including these exciting guests. I would say if one wants to have full control on the scene, one should be a movie director, not a photographer. Or as JW mentioned, shooting in the studio.
Scott Tyack

I call for a selfie free world (yes, the word ‘stick’ deliberately left out).
- Daniel P Sousa
  
  http://www.ibiblio.org/wm/paint/auth/gogh/self/
- Scott Tyack
  
  Good point but I would differentiate between a ‘self-portrait’ and a ‘selfie’.
Sinan

should we ban cakes and cookies that are brought by relatives because of the caterer? should we ban goodlooking clothes because of the expensive bride and groom clothes? should we ban singing friends because of the DJ? come on… smartphones belong into our life, same as cars, computers, coffee-soya-latte and tofu-burgers. Let us include them into our work as a photographer, like the picture here shows it. let’s use them to our advantage, not as our enemies.
- markus_mk
  
  The cake your auntie brings to your wedding does not spoil the cake the caterer made.
  
  The beautiful dress you wear does not interfere with the bride’s dress.
  
  The selfie stick wielding friend or overzealous relative who stands in front of the photographer to snap a picture of the ring exchange with her crappy mobile phone does.
  - sinan
    
    it’s up to you if you let that happen. talking helps, and so i do with the “client”. so most of them tell their friends not to take pictures or videos during the ceremony. if it is their wish, i think no one will dare the risk of having no professional photographs.
    - Feroz Khan
      
      There’s always someone who doesn’t care about what anyone else says, and wants to click or film a video just to post it right away to Facebook, to add to their status or ‘check-in’. And this is extremely irritating not just for the photographers covering the event, but also other guests
- Chris Hutcheson
  
  I think when someone pays me to come in and shoot their event, wedding or performance, they would be just as unpleasantly surprised to discover that my images are obscured by a phone or worse, tablet. I agree it’s the client’s choice how they want to handle this just as much as it’s my responsibility to bring the matter up with them so that they’re aware of the potential issues, so that we can decide how to best handle it.
- TByte
  
  Are you setting the cake you baked in front of the Wedding Cake, obscuring it from view?
  Is the dress you made for yourself to wear a full bridal gown with trail? Or does it include flashing strobe lights sewn into the neckline?
  It is rude to interfere with the plans that the Bride and Groom made for their wedding. Only rude people would not understand that.
- thomas
  
  And when the bride/groom says that you did not capture their wedding correctly and points out the Aunt Eldrid get a better shot with her phone, and why are they paying you when they get better photos from the attendance? Every one of your examples are not the same as photographing a wedding. I have had many good photos ruined because another flash was going off when I took the photo.
- Janet Tyrie
  
  The point is the selfi stick is destroying the professional photographers pictures by getting in the way of the photographer. The average wedding Photographer charges $2000.00 or more for the day. It is selfish of a wedding guest to get in the way of professional shots which the bride and groom will cherish for life. Guest can take as many pics as the want sfter the ceremony!
- Frank Nazario
  
  you are a n ass… R U FREAKING KIDDIN”??!!!!! Tell a groom or bride that you are including candid shots of an a’hole taking video or photos with a freaking stick poking through composed photos and you better hold on to receive the answer… this couple paid big money to have life long memories not to have uncle Tom or aunty screw up the photos because of a freaking stick … or better yet pay for additional editing and post processing costs to remove that crap from the photos.
Kris Dow

The selfie stick thing is godawful, but I am kind of not comfortable with saying ban all devices because I have been in situations myself as a guest where I wanted to take a few quick photos to share with friends or relatives who couldn’t come (often for health reasons) so they don’t have to wait for the official photos to have some idea what it was like. (Of course, the official photos are much better, and generally said folks want at least one copy of an official photo to keep and to really see details, but at least with a quick smartphone photo they can feel more included close to the actual event. Even if it is just one photo so when they speak to grandma in the hospital on the phone, she can say “you looked lovely” and mean it, you know?)

I am all for the couple reminding people they are paying for proper photography, though. When I have taken photos as a guest for the above reasons, I always try to stay aware of where the pro photographer is so I am not in the way. I also don’t try to get photos of poses done for the pro (like group shots) unless I have a specific reason and then I ask first. (Like when my sister-in-law got married they had one group shot outside the church that included the entire wedding party, and I asked the pro if he minded if I took a quick photo also so I could take it right over to my husband, who was in a wheelchair and for health reasons wasn’t going to be able to stay at the event long enough to see everyone. He was basically there just for the ceremony and a couple of quick photos with his sister done by the pro, and then we had to leave. Luckily the pro had no problems at all and I got my photo so my husband could see, and then we got a proper copy from the pro later. But in the meantime my husband was able to talk to his sister about how happy everyone looked, etc. He felt much less detached from the event that way.)

So, not entirely anti-smartphone, but pro-being considerate of the fact that there is a professional photographer trying to get really good photos that will be a billion times nicer than a quick smartphone snap. (I will say that it does help if the couple tell the pro that there is a reason someone is taking photos, like an ill relative in the hospital – my sil explained to her photographer in advance about my husband’s health, so he knew what I was doing and also that he needed to schedule photos of them together first when doing the post wedding photos.)
- Seann Richard Alexander
  
  Yeah, no.
- Kris Dow
  
  Yeah, no what? Yeah, no, the pro photographer being an artist is more important than accomodations to allow people who can’t be there at an important personal event to feel more connected to the day than they would if they have to wait however long it takes the pro to sort through and edit photos and present them to the couple? If that is how you feel, I kind of think maybe being an event photographer isn’t the right area for you, because your needs do not actually come before those of the couple. You are there for them, they are not there for you.
  
  I do think that people need to be aware that seats full of people holding up camera phones is distracting and makes it difficult to get good photos (and is rude besides – you are there for the wedding, not to fuss with your phone) but I know plenty of people who have health problems themselves that might prevent them being there for an important event, and plenty more people who have loved ones who have health problems that may prevent attendance – I don’t think it is an uncommon problem, and smartphones provide a solution in the way of very quick transmission of images that allows those people who can’t attend to still feel like they are somehow participating in the event, which is generally important to all involved. (Actually these days, tech being what it is, someone could even use something real time like FaceTime or Skype and a smartphone, so the person unable to attend in person would feel even more part of things.)
  
  I don’t think I’d hire an event photographer who was unable to be sensitive to that sort of problem.
echomrg

i would ask my guests not to use camera phones during the cerimony, definitely not selfie-sticks. both to avoid spoiling a solemn moment and to avoid spoiling the work of my, dearly paid, photographer. at the party/banquet everyone could do whatever they want, it’s about having fun after all.

anyway, i really don’t get all this hate against selfies and selfie sticks.
if people want to take souvenir pictures or simply have fun why should anyone else be concerned about how they’re doing it?
what’s so different than asking a perfect stranger to take a picture with your camera (expect there’s no risk of someone running away with your camera)?

i agree selfie sticks look a little ridiculous but, *unless they’re being annoying* (e.g. sticking their sticks ;) in front of you at a concert or at a wedding or anything similar) relax and let people have fun.
Wil Fry

The survey at the end only had two choices; surely that was a mistake? What about the most obvious choice: “Let brides and grooms decide how to run their own weddings”.

Put a line in your contract saying you aren’t responsible for selfie sticks that show up in the professional photos.
Mike Hill

Just saying, with my background in wedding photography and journalism I think the photographer is just crying over nothing. Just like who photographers compare lens sizes like men and their dicks. I can remove that selfie stick in photoshop, I can easily dodge that problem because my time and effort put into learning my craft so I know how to avoid what can ruin a shot. Stop with the amateur hour and complaining and do a better job stop blaming others for your lack of skill. If your approach is failing you try a different one. That is what one professional or any will tell you if you really want to know how to make a splash.
- Bosque Photography
  
  Interesting, do you draw in the brides face with Photoshop after someone sticks a tablet before your lens as she sheds a tear when the ring goes on her finger? How do you remove the flair from a flash that blots out the bride’s face as her dad kisses her cheak? Maybe we can just make Frankenstein like composites to get these pictures, so every wedding crasher can do just as they please. Oh and the couple should have to pay for the additional post production time of course.
  - Mike Hill
    
    Why would I when I never go out into the field to shoot an event alone. I am not going to spend 4k on a pretty camera and not have the skills to shoot with it. So drop the amateur hour crap. When I shoot a sporting even or a riot I do not tell others to stop with the cell phones i work around it. Just like I do in weddings. As well as I do not ever shoot alone. I suggest you learn the same ethics I learnt from a man who shot and developed his own wedding photos by hand.
    - Bosque Photography
      
      So you can shoot through people with multiple photographers? You are assuming that the rest of us only shoot alone, and only you know how to shoot. As defensive as you are about your equipment (completely off topic) you make it seem like you are shooting with a cell phone and selfie stick. Does your phone take film? Why don’t you drop the amateur crap and invest in a camera?
      - Mike Hill
        
        Hmmm the point i am making is avoid the crap shots. I bet you do not know what a photo enlarger is or would you like a link for a YouTube video on how to use the cone stamp tool? I refuse to blame other for my short comings and yes I have faced the selfie stick in my photos but I doubt you even know what the diaphragm of a lens is or how the digital censor works. Highly doubt you learnt your what composes a photo or why you use aperture priority or how to get a subject in the foreground blurred but front ground and background sharp as a tack. Do you know the difference in coatings of glass and what content of mercury is used to protect your glass. What is the difference between a canon l series and the ef series lenses? Answer those and maybe we are on the same playing field.
      - Bosque Photography
        
        It is a service to your self and to others that we are all spending time on this issue because we are professionals. Everything you mentioned concerning shot angles and Photoshop post production is seriously basic. I own not just the best equipment, but also current equipment. I’m sure that you and the other photographers reading this also have what they need, and know how to use it. Don’t call other amatures if you don’t want the same treatment. There is always someone with deeper pockets and knowledge. As far as I’m concerned, you can have all the work that involves no cooperation from the client. Be honest. Everyone and every program has limitations. No one can quickly healing brush someone’s face or eye back. A venue can be too crowded for a second shooter. Assume that other photographers are better equipped and invest in upgrades. Assume that everyone can teach something. If chaos works for you great. Let the rest of us develop our client relations. You keep doing whatever.
      - Mike Hill
        
        Did I hit a nerve here? Halmark school of photography taught me my skills as well as a combat photographer at the age I am I own some of the best gear out there through pure hard work no hand outs no loans. I quit wedding photography because I had enough of drunks vomiting on me and assholes like you who feel they are top shit and constantly bragging about who’s camera lens is bigger and better. Once again if you can’t make the shot don’t take the shot. Tell a story work with the environment stop changing it. The magazines I shoot for look for people who can work with the flow find the fly on the wall and have them compose a story without changing what people do. Like i said before I cannot tell rioters to stop so I can get a picture of the man bleeding out or a tiger to pose while I shoot my clients should not work with me I am hired by them to work for them. They are paying me they get the shots they want through talking to me and giving me ideas. I can make up my story to what I see but they have theirs and I am going to tell their story the way they want it told. That is how the companies I shoot for work and that is how I have stayed employed with art. Maybe read a Brain Adams book because hell that man taught me so much.
      - Bosque Photography
        
        Ha, not at all, thank you for all of your time, constructive advice and measured responses. Clearly you are the best ever. Forgive me for leaving you the last word when you reply, but I have a lot of work from paying clients.
      - Mike Hill
        
        I am sorry but friends and families do not count as clients. Remember ask the print shop to use 12 cmyk at 600 dpi before printing your work which. Oh I am not the best I am friends with people far better than me. I will say I have learnt my skills from the best and any real photographer who does real work knows how to adapt to what happens. If you like to read I can advise you a lot of good books but then you would have to learn to change perspective to your flawed outlook to the customer works for you not you working for the customer.
      - Bosque Photography
        
        Thanks again! You’re the best!
      - Mike Hill
        
        No the man who does Phlearn photography is the best. I am some idiot with a canon cellphone who has his cellphone pics published in magazines.
      - Frank Nazario
        
        LMAO!!!.. Yeah now im completely convinced you are a snob.. get your head out of your ass, and be more humble about yourself. Its a miracle that with this piece of shit attitude you have you have not been shot of beaten in one of those famous riots you are so proud of shooting.
    - Frank Nazario
      
      You are an absolute snob… even if you do have the knowledge wich at this time i seriously doubt.
Jeremy Cove

At least a ban on tablets and the sticks.
- Kris Dow
  
  Oh, my favorite thing at events in general, not just weddings, is when you are there (not even as a photographer, just in the audience or whatever) and it’s like a sea of people holding up tablets or giant tablet-phones. I have not yet encountered that many selfie sticks in the wild yet, but I really do not understand watching an entire event on your tablet screen WHEN YOU ARE ACTUALLY THERE.
  
  That’d really suck if it was a wedding or other personal event, too, and rather than looking out at all the people you invited to share the moment and seeing faces, you just got a wall of tablets. I’d be pretty pissed at my guests about that. (One person with a device situated sensibly out of the way using FaceTime to patch in Aunt Mabel who is in the hospital with a broken hip and that is prearranged, fine. Sea of devices? Not fine.)
- Jeremy Cove
  
  Totally agree Kris.
Alex Thompson

If anyone had this at my wedding i would have walked out of line to go break it, throw it in the bushes, and then resume. I paid to have a photographer for a reason. If you cant see with your phone dont inconvenience others with your selfish stick in their face trying to play photographer. Its okay to want to take pictures but thats too far.
- Bosque Photography
  
  Yes! Your pro would also have gotten great shots of you being the hero that you are, defending the honor of your wedding and bride.
Jezz1966

As a vicar who takes a good few weddings (and, hopefully, a few good weddings) I’m not keen on the unrestricted use of phones. That’s because the guests are not supposed to be there as observers but participants. Being stuck behind a screen throughout the ceremony makes them an observer, and I regard that a disrespectful to both the couple making their vows and to the ceremony itself. A pro photographer or two, or simply a designated friend, can be free to concentrate on recording their observations, move about, and work in a way that is appropriate to the place and the event. Plus, a real pro knows that the couple are the most important people present, and not themselves. Sadly, not all paid photographers are pro’s.
- Andrew Miller
  
  Jezz1966 – “not all paid photographers are pro’s”. Yup you are perfectly right there. However not all vicars are nice and friendly! I notice you don’t seem to mind photography and that’s a great bonus to photographers. However I really really wish the CoE and CiW etc would get some sort of guidelines in place for vicars!
Bosque Photography

Smartphone flashes and now these idiot sticks ruin shots that the couple paid to get. These shots, especially the ceremony can not be restaged. The pictures and the historic moments are lost. A best man and everyone in the wedding party should aggressively protect the wedding, keeping this junk out before the start. The photographer can’t police the fools and get the shots the couple need and deserve for their money. Some couples publish a no cell phone and no flash besides the paid and official pro policy with a sign and an insert with the invitations.
Jocelyn Harrold

We talk with bride and groom and so far, they are in agreement with an unplugged wedding. The minster reads a brief paragraph about feeling the moment with the couple AND so far we have had mostly compliance
Senior Adrian

People who use selfie sticks are fucking retarded.
Allen

This is why my contract specifically states that I am not responsible for photos that are obscured or ruined by devices that are brought in or used by guests. I will not issue a refund of be held liable because a guest felt it was more important that they get a shot than me. Also, I state that I get all of the “posed photos”. I shot one wedding where other family members were standing behind me with cell phones or pocket cameras. It took way longer to get all of the shots the couple wanted because I was having to get the couple or their wedding party to look at me instead of Grandma behind me.
shorttphoto

Sick of getting an amazing shot set up only to have the uncle jump into the middle of the aisle ruin the shot
Rexford L

ban selfie sticks.. don’t ban cell phone pictures.. easy enough…
- Frank Nazario
  
  LOL!!! have you been to a wedding lately the cell phone look like center hall decorations in the ceremony everybody poking their arms with the cell phones … a real nightmare.
Lori Brown-Greene

I am completely ok with guests using their own cameras and smartphones as long as it does not interfere with my images. What happens if I lose all of their images? It’s happened to MANY photographers and the couple will have NOTHING!
cowgirlbellydancer

It is so hard to get around people who are standing in the aisles to perform a job that we’ve been paid, really well, for. And seeing those gawd awful LCD screens in half the ceremony pictures? It honestly has made me cry on more than one occasion!
alicepattinson

I think using Selfie Stick Pro in wedding ceremony is really inappropriate.
sglau

The couple should be allowed to decide whatever they want as long as they are willing to live with the consequences of their decision.
Yours Truly Wedding Albums

Selfie sticks should not be ban but guests should be responsible enough on how to use it. Because like on the image about this post, it can ruin a great shots of the couple.
gtvone

Brides and Grooms can ask for it, sure, but you’re the photographer, you have zero place to say what guests can and can’t do – they’re not your guests, they’re theirs! – you’re a professional, put your big boy pants on and work the hell around it!!
Shay Hannan

This photo was taken at my husband and I’s wedding. IC’m beyond horrified that not only has it gone viral, but for the people bashing it. This photo was a husband taking a picture of his wife. Before our reception even started, our photographer informed us of this and showed us the picture. Our response was to ask if pictures of my father and I coming down the aisle and my husband and I coming down the aisle were ruined and the answer was no. We told our photographer that we did care then because that was more important than a processional being “ruined”. I’ve been a bridesmaid 11 times and maid of honor 3 times and have yet to even see a picture of me coming down the aisle at those weddings. The wedding day is about the bride and groom not the wedding party. What upsets us the most is that my matron of honor, my best friend of 26 years and her husband, were humiliated by this picture going viral. Not only that, we’ve only seen this and one other picture of our wedding day from our photographer.
Shay Hannan

This photo was taken at my husband and I’s wedding. I’m beyond horrified that not only has it gone viral, but for the people bashing it. This photo was a husband taking a picture of his wife. Before our reception even started, our photographer informed us of this and showed us the picture. Our response was to ask if pictures of my father and I coming down the aisle and my husband and I coming down the aisle were ruined and the answer was no. We told our photographer that we did care then because that was more important than a processional being “ruined”. I’ve been a bridesmaid 11 times and maid of honor 3 times and have yet to even see a picture of me coming down the aisle at those weddings. The wedding day is about the bride and groom not the wedding party. What upsets us the most is that my matron of honor, my best friend of 26 years and her husband, were humiliated by this picture going viral. Not only that, we’ve only seen this and one other picture of our wedding day from our photographer. So now instead of people talking about our wedding and how much fun they had, they’re talking about a selfie stick, which contradicts our photographers point about how much their clients spend on photography and it is supposed to be about us. This picture was the first picture posted from our wedding. Our thousands of dollars spent was not about us.
Shay Hannan

I’d also like to point out the post was taken down because my husband and I were upset as was our friends and family, not because it was taking away from the photographers work.
Shay Hannan

This photo was taken at my husband and I’s wedding. I’m beyond horrified that not only has it gone viral, but for the people bashing it. This photo was a husband taking a picture of his wife. Before our reception even started, our photographer informed us of this and showed us the picture. Our response was to ask if pictures of my father and I coming down the aisle and my husband and I coming down the aisle were ruined and the answer was no. We told our photographer that we did care then because that was more important than a processional being “ruined”. I’ve been a bridesmaid 11 times and maid of honor 3 times and have yet to even see a picture of me coming down the aisle at those weddings. The wedding day is about the bride and groom not the wedding party. What upsets us the most is that my matron of honor, my best friend of 26 years and her husband, were humiliated by this picture going viral. Not only that, we’ve only seen this and one other picture of our wedding day from our photographer. So now instead of people talking about our wedding and how much fun they had, they’re talking about a selfie stick, which contradicts our photographers point about how much their clients spend on photography and it is supposed to be about us. This picture was the first picture posted from our wedding. Our thousands of dollars spent was not about us.
mustdisqus

The future is bleak enough for photographers who specialise in specific events, and this fad isn’t going to help, with more and more people no longer requesting a ‘professional’ to do any work whatsoever. If a family member has become quite skilled, they will become the event’s photographer.

Everyone wants to be the photographer in today’s society. As if smartphones weren’t annoying enough with thousands of people at a music gig jumping up and down with their phones in the air attempting to constantly snap rather than enjoy (or bootleg events with recorded videos). Sigh. I’m pretty sure these sticks will be limited in where they can be used, but I primarily dislike them because you can often still see part of the stick in the photo, and they disrupt the flow of any event, with everyone gathering together. They also physically get in everyone’s way when the holder doesn’t know how to be discreet. More than one person with a stick at the event you’ve been hired for, working as a professional? Good luck! :)

http://metro.co.uk/2015/04/25/15-selfie-stick-fails-which-prove-once-and-for-all-that-theyre-the-devils-work-5166341/