The Flashpoint StreakLight 360 has the funniest instructions ever. Including “You might DIE” reference

The Flashpoint StreakLight 360 is known by many names. Godox, for example,  sells it as the Witstro AD360II. But there is a solid reason to buy that strobe under the Flashpoint brand, and that is that it has the best instruction set ever made for a strobe. (Thanks Chris-Burger for sending those over)

Forget about Chinese machine-translated texts, this one is 100% original and it will get you LOLing at lest a few times if you read it through. Actually, I think that this instruction set is a work of art. So rather than throwing that manual away, take the time and RTFM, you’ll thanks me later.

Here is a scanned copy of the manual, followed by some text. And now, RTFM!

If you want a clearer text, here is bakc on white version (bolding is mine)

For Your Safety

• Always keep this product dry. Do not use in rain or in damp conditions.
• This product contains high-voltage electronic parts. Touching the high-voltage circuit inside it may result in electric shock. Do not disassemble. Should repairs become necessary, this product must be sent to an authorized maintenance center.
• Stop using this product if it breaks open due to internal shifting, falling or strong impact. STRONG electric shock may occur if you touch the components inside it. You might DIE. Don’t risk It. Reincarnation Is not covered by the warranty.
• Do not fire the flash directly Into the eyes (especially those of babies and pets) within short distances. Otherwise visual Impairment may occur. When taking pictures for babies, keep the flash unit at least 1 meter (3.3 feet) away from them. Using bounce flash to reduce light intensity Is also recommended. Plus It will make them look cuter. Because it creates softer light, and larger catchlights In the eyes. And makes them look more angelic. Which is good. Cause they are babies. They are SUPPOSED to look angelic! Also you won’t get hard shadows from that ridiculous gigantic bow they decided to stick on the baby’s head if you bounce your light.
• Do not use the flash unit in the presence of flammable gases, chemicals and other similar materials. In certain circumstances, these materials may be sensitive to the strong light emitting from this flash unit and fire may result. A whole new meaning to “Flashpoint”.
• Do not leave or store the flash unit if the ambient temperature reads over S0°C (e.g. in automobile in the sun). Otherwise the electronic parts may be damaged.
• Be cautious when using the Streaklight TTL on your camera. The Streaklight TTL is heavy and torque from sideways pressure on your camera may damage the camera hotshoe. Try to keep you camera in a horizontal orientation, or use a flash bracket
• Do not use any power supply other than the included one to charge the battery
• Do not insert metal parts into any lighting equipment
• When at a sporting event, do not refer to your strobes as “Streakers”
• Do not touch the electrical contacts on the flash or battery or contact them with any conductive materials.
• This flash has an over-heat protection circuit, rapid continuous firing will cause the flash to slow operation and trigger a “cool down” period. After this period,. the flash will resume normal operation. You may also reboot the flash by cycling the power off and then on.
• Do not use selective coloring
• Do not use the flash to support other equipment. For example, do not lift your camera by the flash
• The flash has a locking pin to ensure secure operation. To avoid damage, completely unscrew the locking ring before removing the flash.
• In case of abnormal function, sparks, excessive heat, flames or smoke, immediately power off the unit and disconnect the battery if safely possible. Have it checked by an authorized technician

Now, I am not sure who is the technical writer of these instructions, but I think they deserve a raise.