If I had to guess, I would say that Derek Pye, who claims to be the The World’s Greatest Living Wedding Photographer, is pretty annoyed with the prices of lighting accessories. To express his frustration he designed the bogus existing Fangled Pyelight™ – a 3 in 1 Continuous Medieval Daylight Lighting Sword.
According to Derek, this “lighting modifier” boasts three modes:
Eye Blind Mode features searing continuous light for ultra creative wedding shoot shots.
Cake Cut and Bake mode. Because the Pyelight™
is also an actual fully functioning very sharp sword it can be used to
effortlessly capture one of the most exciting and demanding sections of
the day – the essential cutting of the cake wedding photo art moment!
Death mode can be used all day long for general prodding, stabbing, cutting, bridal preps, mutilations and essential decapitations.
Tech specs (Taken from Product Release announcement)
- Good for appox 125000 centuries of continuous blinding light depending on the darkness of users soul.
- Up to 10000 decapitations until sharpening required. If you’re not
in prison by then and your Clikpic website is still online you can
return the Pyelight™ to us for resharpening free of charge.
- Guarantee! Up to 4 cakes can be cut before the blade snaps in two. No refunds.
- Disclaimer: Pyelights™ are bloody sharp. Always hold your Pyelight™
by the handle bit. Only to be used by children under 5 in a supervised
soft play centre or on council estates in police no go areas. Derek Pye
takes no responsibility for anything ever.
- Health Warning: May harm virtually anything it touches. In tests less than 5% of users had their arm blown off when using a Pyelight™ – more Mexican drug dealers are usually,but not always, killed in one weekend than Pyelight™ users over the corresponding weekend!
While this tongue in cheek announcement is pretty hilarious (if you like dark humor), Derek is addressing a concern over the prices of lighting accessories.
[Product Launch! The New Fangled Pyelight™ | Derek Pye]